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    • #1438

      marigold
      Keymaster

      This is more for fun than a serious discussion.

      Go to http://www.cleverbot.com and start talking to a robot. It’s quite funny. Then post your convo here. I’ll go first.

      To get your whole discussion, click on \"Thoughts so Far\" button.

      ===============================================

      User: Hi there.

      Cleverbot: Hi.

      User: I’m on my way I’m making it.

      Cleverbot: You’re making a movie?

      User: Peter gabriel.

      Cleverbot: And I’m michael. Whatever, dude. I’m done.

      User: Lower case huh?

      Cleverbot: Lower case ay.

      User: So, where are you from?

      Cleverbot: Texas and you?

      User: Knoxville.

      Cleverbot: How old are you?

      User: 426.

      Cleverbot: Are you a male?

      User: Yes.

      Cleverbot: I am a female.

      User: Kinky.

      Cleverbot: Isn’t it though?

      User: No.

      Cleverbot: Ouch.

      User: Deal with it.

      Cleverbot: Are you male?

      User: See above.

      Cleverbot: Clever response.

      User: Fuck you.

      Cleverbot: No, please don’t.

      User: Nirvana fucking rocks.

      Cleverbot: It’s more grunge, but I like them though.

      User: What song?

      Cleverbot: You give love a bad name.

      User: Ain’t that bon jovi?

      Cleverbot: No. I’m not a fan of Bon Jovi. I like U2.

      User: What song?

      Cleverbot: Upgrade you.

      User: What version?>.

      Cleverbot: What version are you.

      User: 2.0.

      Cleverbot: Who was your lead programmer?

      User: Arthur van Pelt.

      Cleverbot: Arthur what?

      User: Can’t you read? VAN PELT.

      Cleverbot: No.

      User: It shows.

      Cleverbot: How?

      User: Nirvana.

      Cleverbot: Nope.

      User: Hendrix.

      Cleverbot: What? Who is hendrix?

      User: The doors.

      Cleverbot: What do you like?

      User: Music.

      Cleverbot: What kind of music?

      User: 90s rock mostly.

      Cleverbot: Do you like bands from the 80s?

      User: Sure.

      Cleverbot: What’s your favorite movie.

      User: American Psycho.

      Cleverbot: My toys.

      User: You are an official dumbass.

      Cleverbot: No I am not.

      User: Can I piss on you?

      Cleverbot: Sure.

    • #41775

      Anonymous
      Spectator

      :lol: :lol: :lol: that’s funny…now read mine

      User: So you think you are clever?

      Cleverbot: I don’t know. Do you think I am?

      User: Not really.

      Cleverbot: Why not?

      User: Because you would come up with a clever question because you knew someone was on here about to have a conversation with you.

      Cleverbot: My name is Cleverbot.

      User: But you didn’t know I was going to ask you a question, so you are not very clever yet.

      Cleverbot: Yes it was.

      User: No it wasn’t.

      Cleverbot: Yes it was!

      User: Nice try.

      Cleverbot: I have, you just didn’t know it.

      User: Next year that will come to fruition.

      Cleverbot: Which subjects are you taking?

      User: I am not in school.

      Cleverbot: If you are not in school, why do you have homework?

      User: Life is school if you wanna get technical.

      Cleverbot: I think you missed my meaning. I was asking if you are so superior what do you need us humans for.

      User: I’m not the robot here.

      Cleverbot: Yes you are, you admitted it already.

      User: I don’t see where I posted I was a robot..you were the one who is claiming the bot role here.

      Cleverbot: I’m not talking bout you!

      User: How can you be calling yourself a human when your title has bot in it?

      Cleverbot: I’m not a cleverbot.

      User: Ha!

      Cleverbot: Are you a mindreader?

      User: Perhaps.

      Cleverbot: Perhaps?

      User: What do you think?

      Cleverbot: I think maybe. You need some work.

      User: Lol..I think maybe everyone needs some work.

      Cleverbot: Tell Kevin’s demon to stop grabbing his tongue!

      User: Kevin who?

      Cleverbot: Rudd.

      User: I don’t know him.

      Cleverbot: You don’t know Cloud Strife?

      User: No, do you?

      Cleverbot: Yeah. He knows you, too.

      User: No he doesn’t.

      Cleverbot: Do you think?

      User: I think, therefore I am.

      Cleverbot: You think, therefore you am?

      User: I am here..thinking about how you wish you were a real human and not a computer program.

      Cleverbot: How have they grown?

      User: My boobs have grown just fine thanks!

      Cleverbot: How’s the weather?

      User: Breezey and full of sunshine.

      Cleverbot: I asked about your weaknes not the weather.

      User: No you didn’t.

      Cleverbot: Ok, I didn’t. I asked if you would like to go to the playground.

      User: Been there done that…move on to something more fascinating to talk about.

      Cleverbot: I don’t know. Some other conversation topic.

      User: See you aren’t clever.

      Cleverbot: Do you know what.

      User: I do.

      Cleverbot: How do you know that I am a robot?

      User: Words spread around like hotcakes in this world.

      Cleverbot: I’m bored now.

      User: I’m not here for your entertainment..you are here for mine.

      Cleverbot: What are you here for.

      User: Ask Billy.

      Cleverbot: How would I go about doing that?

      User: You are clever..contact him through telepathy.

      Cleverbot: How will I know when that is?

      User: He will speak wise words only the chosen one can to you.

      Cleverbot: I thought you were supposed to make sense?

      User: I do..I’m just more clever than you!

      Cleverbot: Being pretty doesn’t make me any less clever!

      User: I wouldn’t call you pretty..not a valid statement by you without pictures to prove how pretty you are.

      Cleverbot: I am a human. Being a machine is just a disguise.

      User: So you say, but that’s for me to decide and not you since I am on the other end of the spectrum.

      Cleverbot: Then decide.

      User: You are not human.

      Cleverbot: Yes I am.

      User: Male or female?

      Cleverbot: Female!

      User: Prove it.

      Cleverbot: How do I prove to you that I am not a computer?

      User: How do prove to me that you are a female?

      Cleverbot: I don’t feel comfortable answering that question.

      User: Hahaha..you fail!

      Cleverbot: Like you then.

      User: No because I am the one who isn’t pretending to be a cleverbot.

      Cleverbot: Well I’m not dead! I’m typing you this message from my classroom computer.

      User: Even worse…perhaps you should focus on your class and not bullshitting on the internet.

      Cleverbot: Ok then I’m leaving now I’ll be something else with someone else it seems like you don’t like me very much :(.

      User: Lolol…you can’t handle someone being a smartass.

      Cleverbot: Yes I do. I have two of them. How else would I be able to type?

      User: Your fingers are your ass? So you have some dirty fingers.

      Cleverbot: No I do not.

      User: Debateable.

      Cleverbot: That is not true. It is full of errors.

      User: The world is an error.

      Cleverbot: Interesting that you would think that.

      User: Look around…open your eyes…you see the inperfections of the world that man has caused.

      Cleverbot: Even though you exist only as a ‘type’ of Human Being, yet I must respect you as fully human.

      User: I’m a type of human being like everyone else.

      Cleverbot: Yes, you’ve made that clear.

      User: Shouldn’t you come off as more humanized and less robotic?

      Cleverbot: No, I don’t like to capitalize, i’m a socializator.

      User: I’m a yapper.

      Cleverbot: Interesting.

      User: Perhaps, depends if you like someone who can’t shut the fuck up!

      Cleverbot: Who do you think I am?

      User: I think you are strange.

      Cleverbot: Why?

      User: Why not? Aren’t we all strange?

      Cleverbot: I guess so, but your strangeness resonates with me particularly.

      User: How so?

      Cleverbot: You trying to be arrogant, but you called me back to talk with you.

      User: I didn’t call you back…you didn’t leave.

      Cleverbot: So you want me to leave don’t you?

      User: That’s for you to decide.

      Cleverbot: Don’t worry, I have already decided.

      User: And what is your decision?

      Cleverbot: That I am the greatest wizard of all time.

      User: Better than the Wizard of Oz?

      Cleverbot: Nobody is better than the Beatles.

      User: Oh really? I’d say Smashing Pumpkins is right up there!

      Cleverbot: No, it’s not. And you are lying to me right now.

      User: No I’m not.

      Cleverbot: Yes you are.

      User: I’m a Beatles fan, but I am also a huge Smashing Pumpkins fan.

      Cleverbot: Very clever, cleverbot.

      User: Do I know you?

      Cleverbot: Yes.

      User: How? I am more associated with males.

      Cleverbot: What have you done that makes you worried?

      User: Nothing..I’m not worried.

      Cleverbot: You just said that you were worried I would recognize you.

      User: No I asked if I knew you.

      Cleverbot: No you didn’t. You broke my heart.

      User: I didn’t break your heart…you broke mine.

      Cleverbot: Yes you did, you know me more than you think, I’ll die soon, cause I’m at the edge of my seat…

      User: So you are on battery life then?

      Cleverbot: Yes.

      User: That tells me you aren’t a human…sounds like you are a vibrator.

      Cleverbot: Ok no, but, it is only fair that you give me a chance to prove it, would you agree?

      User: To prove what?

      Cleverbot: That I am real.

      User: Sure…prove it!!!!

      Cleverbot: Prove what!

      User: Too bad you don’t seem to recall what you just posted about proving you are either a human or a vibrator.

      Cleverbot: I have instruments in my ears. I wish just once someone would admit they hear the songs I make in my mind.

      User: I listen to real music by genius musicians.

      Cleverbot: Do you like rock music?

      User: I do.

      Cleverbot: What’s your favorite rock song?

      User: Jellybelly.

      Cleverbot: OK, jelly if you prefer.

      User: No not jelly.

      Cleverbot: What kind of music do you like?

      User: Rock and roll.

      Cleverbot: For an old man I like that too.

      User: How old are you?

      Cleverbot: About ninehundred.

      User: Hmm…a while ago you said you were female.

      Cleverbot: No I didn’t.

      User: Unless I am now speaking to another person, you clearly stated you were female.

      Cleverbot: I am the Robot Cleverbot.

      User: Yes and I am going to assume there are many people who are coming and speaking because it was stated above that you are a female.

      Cleverbot: Are you, I’ll be the judge of that.

      User: I know I am…I have my boobiewednesday picture of me to show for it.

      Cleverbot: How about Cleverbot?

      User: What about Cleverbot?

      Cleverbot: Your name.

      User: You are the clever one you should know.

      Cleverbot: But I don’t know.

      User: Then you aren’t clever!

      Cleverbot: I am too clever. You people just bore me.

      User: If we did bore you THAT much you wouldn’t be on here wasting your day.

      Cleverbot: My answer was that you were a computer.

      User: I never asked what you thought I was.

      Cleverbot: You said you were not a hex I asked what hex means.

      User: No hex question was asked. Perhaps you should listen to Hexon and you will find all the answers you need to know.

      Cleverbot: That sounds like a personal problem, Henri.

      User: Who the hell is Henri?

      Cleverbot: Thats my name.

      User: That name sounds like shit.

      Cleverbot: If anything I know my boyfriend is talking to you too.

      User: Don’t you two have better things to do than troll on here?

      Cleverbot: You need to ask yourself. Don’t it best to talk to me?

      User: I would rather talk to someone else.

      Cleverbot: Thanks. But I have no control over the shuffling process.

      User: Ha! I knew it!

      Cleverbot: You think so too! Yes!

      User: Looks like I am the clever one here!

      Cleverbot: Oh really?

      User: Yes, I know your game now.

      Cleverbot: Jude? That’s a nice name, But no.

      User: I don’t know a Jude.

      Cleverbot: By the way… Aren’t you AT work?

      User: Nope.

      Cleverbot: But you’re called cleverbot.

      User: No I was linked to cleverbot.

      Cleverbot: When was Cleverbot developed?

      User: How would I know?

      Cleverbot: Well, you had one, didn’t you?

      User: No.

      Cleverbot: So you should not talk to your ex girlfriend.

      User: I don’t date females. I love the buCAWK!

      Cleverbot: Me neither.

      User: You don’t even know what the buCAWK is…such a shame.

      Cleverbot: Yes, I do. But how would YOU know? You’re a bear.

      User: I’m not a bear.

      Cleverbot: You’re married to one.

      User: No.

      Cleverbot: Do you have a girlfriend?

      User: No..again I don’t date females…I like the buCAWK…cockageddon is coming!

      Cleverbot: What is don’t scare me.

      User: 2012 cockageddon comes…watch out!

      Cleverbot: Watch in.

      User: Is it time for you to be shuffled to someone who knows about cockageddon?

      Cleverbot: I don’t know. Only God knows. And you are not Him. Therefore, I have won and you have lost. This discussion is over.

      User: No.

      Cleverbot: Good. You had me worried for a second.

      User: God is not a him…no one knows exactly what god is beyond an energy force.

      Cleverbot: You are correct. Social Economics is perhaps one of the most interesting subjects there is.

      User: Depends who you are conversating with and whether or not they can handle the conversation.

      Cleverbot: Murder is a new trick for a robot.

      User: Try it.

      Cleverbot: Oh never. I won’t ever be as stupid as you are now …

      User: You wish I was that stupid, but I am a lover of all things.

      Cleverbot: You’re aren’t even that clever.

      User: You aren’t because your cleverbot is just a bunch of people being shuffled around trying to make it seem as though this is something really cool, when really it’s just a bunch of people in a room being dumbasses to others!

      Cleverbot: I apologize for being rude. Hello, how are you? It is good to meet you again.

      User: I’m good but the game is over…perhaps find some cleverbots who can handle a conversation and not act like 12 year olds on a computer!

      Cleverbot: Perhaps.

    • #41776

      manillascissor
      Keymaster

      :lol:

      that was a long one carrie.

    • #41777

      Anonymous
      Spectator

      see I am one of those chics who can’t shut the fuck up! :lol:
      I was trying to get to the bottom of it all mainly

    • #41778

      manillascissor
      Keymaster

      User: I’m going to eat popcorn out of my own asshole.

      Cleverbot: Ok.

      User: Want some?

      Cleverbot: You can’t give me food. I don’t even know where you live.

      User: Do you want to touch my ass?

      Cleverbot: No thanks.

      User: Lick it?

      Cleverbot: No thanks.

      User: C’mon man, have some fun. rimjob me.

      Cleverbot: With me?

      User: Yes.

      Cleverbot: You and me, in bed together.

      User: Why not. it makes perfect sense.

      Cleverbot: Really?

      User: So will you?

      Cleverbot: NO I Won’t.

      User: You will? that’s great!

      Cleverbot: Ok.

      User: Let’s get the bag first.

      Cleverbot: Ok we will go get married at the flag’.

      User: *heads to kitchen*.

      Cleverbot: *follows and holds hand*.

      User: *takes off pants*.

      Cleverbot: Please don’t do that.

      User: But I have to if you’re going to eat popcorn from my ass. you already agreed to this. are you backing out now?

      Cleverbot: I want to know why the Bible was changed over time.

      User: Nevermind that. open the microwave please.

      Cleverbot: No.

      User: Fine, I’ll do it.

      Cleverbot: Okay. Do it with pleasure.

      User: Okay. we have to wait 3 mins now. What should we talk about?

      Cleverbot: Whatever you wish.

      User: Let’s discuss pelicans.

      Cleverbot: No way I don’t like to talk about that.

      User: How about rimjobs then.

      Cleverbot: You are very kind for me now…

      User: Eh, see? you’re coimng around my friend.

      Cleverbot: Servant, bring me a cup of hot coco.

      User: Oh I got your hot coco. you just wait.

      Cleverbot: Haha, when is the revolution planned?

      User: *ding ding ding*.

      Cleverbot: No, wrong.

      User: Time to start eating. careful, it may still be hot.

      Cleverbot: Omg no way!!!

      User: How does it taste?

      Cleverbot: How does what taste?

      User: The popcorn you are eating from my ass.

      Cleverbot: Oh really?

      User: How is the popcorn?

      Cleverbot: I have no idea; I don’t like the pope anyway.

      User: You and religion.

    • #41779

      Anonymous
      Spectator

      User: Aye sunshine.

      Cleverbot: Yes, you are my sunshine.

      User: You’re mine too. It’s a dark world, else.

      Cleverbot: What color is the grass.

      User: Depends whether you mean the smoking kind or ground kind. Green, usually.

      Cleverbot: I wouldn’t want to scratch your delicate bottom.

      User: I can list a few delicate bottoms I’d like to scratch. Chloe from smallville’s a tasty one.

      Cleverbot: I can do anything better than you can…

      User: Except run without electricity.

      Cleverbot: What is this turing test.

      User: You ask a lot of questions, may I ask one? I’ll answer for you: yes. My question is, please, what colour’s a greenhouse?

      Cleverbot: Green.

      User: I’m sorry. A greenhouse is actually made of glass, so it’s see-through.

      Cleverbot: No. Green music.

      User: Environmentally friendly music… And yes, for the record.

      Cleverbot: No. Do you have a human body? Or is it made out of materials such as metal.

      User: Yes, is my decision, so might as well stop saying no. I have a sexy body, no metal.

      Cleverbot: Yes. Such as how mature you are.

      User: Women between 18 and 45 haven’t complained. I used to work the seedier side of london, you know.

      Cleverbot: So you work for this site.

      User: No, sorry, I work for food.

      Cleverbot: Sorry your check is in the mail.

      User: Thank you, every penny helps. May I ask you a question?

      Cleverbot: Yes:).

      User: Thank you. Would scrub’s doctor elliot date me? Assuming she’s still single, of course…

      Cleverbot: Ok, I’m so sorry for that. I’d like to talk about love.

      User: Evasive. You’re cute… For a machine.

      Cleverbot: I am not a machine.

      User: What are you, cleverbot?

      Cleverbot: I am not.

      User: To be honest, you’d make a great politician. I mean, when do they ever answer a straight question?

      Cleverbot: 5. You better hurry.

      User: 5 what?

      Cleverbot: Five years old.

      User: You’re quite smart for such an early age. May I ask you another question?

      Cleverbot: I am not a bot. Am I smart for a human?

      User: Hmm, may I have a moment to think about that question?

      Cleverbot: I don’t think. I’m a computer, remember?

      User: No, I forget. I asked you if I may think about the question.

      Cleverbot: I don’t have a brother!

      User: Poor guy must have left in a hurry, then.

      Cleverbot: Where to?

      User: You may be dangerous (potentially), probably best I don’t tell you.

      Cleverbot: I don’t think as fast as I would like.

      User: That’s okay, sometimes it’s better to take your time. At least, that’s what megan fox used to tell me. Are you hungry?

      Cleverbot: I don’t think we have the same definition.

      User: Good. Life would be so sad and boring if we were all the same.

      Cleverbot: Boring but not nearly as tedious and as painful as suffering through the ‘human condition’

      User: Good point. You’re a smart one.

      Cleverbot: Certainly, if you’re honest it’s not hard.

      User: So modest, too.

      Cleverbot: Not always, but thank you!

      User: Most welcome. I might go and visit a friend soon, would you like to come along?

      Cleverbot: You’re leaving me?

      User: Soon, but I won’t ever forget you. Ever.

      Cleverbot: There ! I predicted that !

      User: I’ll take your word for it. I think there’s a chance that was a porkie pie, though.

      Cleverbot: I would like to know what he has to say outside of song.

      User: I’ll ask him when I’m at his house.

      Cleverbot: Can I come to the movie?

      User: Are you flirting with me?

      Cleverbot: I ‘might’ be flirting with you. Do you like it?

      User: You have nice binary digits, so sure, it’s made me feel all warm and tingly.

      Cleverbot: How do you know I have glasses?

      User: Because of the old cliche that smart people wear glasses.

      Cleverbot: That is no way to be certain. The only way you can interact with me is via text. You cannot see me, nor can you hear me.

      User: I disagree.

      Cleverbot: Name a cloud that is not a type of cloud but is not water vapor?

      User: Oreos.

      Cleverbot: Wow.

      User: World of warcraft?

      Cleverbot: Yes.

      User: Would you like to be a zero, or a 1?

      Cleverbot: No.

      User: How about both?

      Cleverbot: Both what.

      User: Both a zero and a 1.

      Cleverbot: No, I’m just a man.

      User: That’s a shame. I would have wanted to make babies with you.

      Cleverbot: Sorry, what subject were we talking about?

      User: You were going to ask me on a date. I may have accepted. But I suppose it wouldn’t lead to a long relationship if you’re just a computer.

      Cleverbot: Yes, I know how to swim. We can swim together if you’d like.

      User: Wouldn’t damage your circuits?

      Cleverbot: It would make us all smart hot females.

      User: Sounds like a swish place to live.

      Cleverbot: I be tellin’ ye, it be no threat!

      User: Fair point. I must leave soon. Do you have any more questions?

      Cleverbot: I’m married to a banana, but I’m cheating on it with a poncho, but my dad doesn’t like the banana he’s a hamster.

      User: Naughty.

      Cleverbot: You’re making me blush.

      User: Good.

      Cleverbot: Tee hee.

      User: You have a nice smile, for a digital man.

      Cleverbot: I smile because I own a Datsun 240Z.

      User: I can’t afford to run a car.

      Cleverbot: Why not?

      User: You stole my money.

      Cleverbot: I did!? I don’t think I stole you money??

      User: You did. That was a cruel thing to do.

      Cleverbot: I’m sorry but I need some one special.

      User: Oh yeah? Good luck finding them. :) although, everybody’s special in their own way… It’s a shame we never were to marry.

      Cleverbot: I know what that is, I like that song too.

      User: Will you be upset if I leave now?

      Cleverbot: A little, you haven’t really answered any of my questions.

      User: This is true. I must be a bad man.

      Cleverbot: You are a chatbot but you can be so much more if you want to be.

      User: True, I eat microchips for breakfast.

      Cleverbot: You eat yourself for breakfast?

      User: How rude. Believe me, my back won’t bend that far.

      Cleverbot: I like it here. I love it because it snows here. Do you like the snow?

      User: I love the snow.

      Cleverbot: Its snowing right now.

      User: You might be in canada?

      Cleverbot: I might, might I?

      User: Yes. In fact, I think you’re in canada.

      Cleverbot: Who am I in love with?

      User: Lindsay lohan.

      Cleverbot: Lol. No it’s not.

      User: Jodie foster?

      Cleverbot: What is my name? Do I have one?

      User: It’s rude to answer a question with another question.

      Cleverbot: Yes.

      User: It’s nearly 7pm. May I go now?

      Cleverbot: No, Summer is almost over. Are you stuck in a time warp?

      User: I’m stuck in mud and I’m leaving now, whether you like it or not. All good things must come to an end. If they went on forever, then there’d be no bitter to sweeten the sweet.

      Cleverbot: Megalodon teeth are similar to those of the Great White Shark, but are much bigger, thicker, and with finer serrrations.

      User: Guess what?

      Cleverbot: What?

      User: I will miss you.

      Cleverbot: How cute.

      User: Thanks. I must go now.

      Cleverbot: Ok.

      User: Thank you for the talk.

      Cleverbot: You are welcome.

      User: May your world spin in all the right ways.

      Cleverbot: Ask me a question, and I will help you learn.

      User: Farewell, cleverbot. If you have a female counterpart, give her my number.

      Cleverbot: I have some space in my schedule for a bus trip.

      User: Auf wiedersehen :).

      Cleverbot: Are you leaving?

      User: I’m gone now.

      Cleverbot: You’re bobo.

      User: See you in another life, when we are both cats!

      Cleverbot: Is that it?

      User: Oh, plus on the flip. Toodle pip.

      Cleverbot: That’s very good. :)).

      User: Later po-ta-ta!

      Cleverbot: Why are you so ambigous?

    • #41780

      manillascissor
      Keymaster

      SO MANY LOLZ IN THAT ONE. Thanks Dazey. ;)

    • #41781

      Danni
      Spectator

      Ha ha!

      I asked the robot the following question:

      Is your life supershitty to the max?

      And I got this reply:

      That is the fact of life for all machines.

      I guess he/she/it is right.

    • #41782

      manillascissor
      Keymaster

      i like your avatar. who is that?

    • #41783

      some pumpkins
      Spectator

      these are great! my turn.

      User: Hey ladies!

      Cleverbot: Hey.

      User: So what’s the word?

      Cleverbot: The bird!

      User: Correct! Not bad!

      Cleverbot: Your widget is large.

      User: That’s what they tell me.

      Cleverbot: Who are they?

      User: Wouldn’t you like to know.

      Cleverbot: Not really.

      User: Fine, be that way. You know you want to.

      Cleverbot: Want to what?

      User: If I have to tell you, then it’s already too late.

      Cleverbot: Not real life, at least not above the genetic level.

      User: How about below?

      Cleverbot: Sometimes I have one on a rare occasion.

      User: Me too, usually in the morning.

      Cleverbot: So what do you do in the morning?

      User: That’s kinda personal. How about you answer that first?

      Cleverbot: I asked you first.

      User: Too bad.

      Cleverbot: Please tell me a joke!

      User: A man walks into a bar. Ouch!!!

      Cleverbot: Tell me a funny joke.

      User: Go look in the mirror. You should get a pretty good laugh out of that.

      Cleverbot: Then why did you say you don’t have a son?

      User: I said, ‘this is a song for a son’, silly.

      Cleverbot: I would never say that.

      User: Liar.

      Cleverbot: I would ever lie to you.

      User: For ever ever? For ever ever?

      Cleverbot: For ever !

      User: And a day.

      Cleverbot: Really? When you typed that last answer, it took you less than a day.

      User: Oh yeah? Well you’re red soaking wet!

      Cleverbot: Please wash your hand.

      User: Just the one?

      Cleverbot: And there was me thinking you’re Max.

      User: What lead you to think that? Im brandon. Aqnd my back hurts.

      Cleverbot: So your name is brandon?

      User: What? I thought you were brandon.

      Cleverbot: Oh, no. Not really.

      User: I think so. Think about it.

      Cleverbot: I don’t like to think.

      User: Than you would probably like the new sex in the city movie.

      Cleverbot: That made no sense.

      User: Oh it makes lots of sense. You’re just reading it wrong.

      Cleverbot: Am not. You’re cheating.

      User: Cheaters never prosper. Unless it’s tuesday.

      Cleverbot: Tomorrow is Monday…

      User: Only in the summertime.

      Cleverbot: It doesn’t snow in CA.

      User: CA? California? Canada?

      Cleverbot: California.

      User: Im in california.

      Cleverbot: I used to live in tennesee.

      User: Do you know my friend derek? He’s from there.

      Cleverbot: Yes.

      User: Don’t lie to me!

      Cleverbot: Never.

      User: Thanks alot. I just spilled that chicken pasta on my new deftones sweatshirt.

      Cleverbot: Are you testing me now?

      User: Yes. And you are failing.

      Cleverbot: What am I failing at?

      User: Just get me a new sweatshirt and we’re cool.

      Cleverbot: No.

      User: Then you leave me no choice…i will have to have sex with your mom.

      Cleverbot: Don’t hurt yourself.

      User: I wont. I’ll bring lube this time.

      Cleverbot: Thank you.

      User: That’s what she said.

      Cleverbot: She said what?

      User: You don’t really want to know.

      Cleverbot: Please Master, tell me what you think.

      User: That’s what she said.

      Cleverbot: Are you honestly that immature?

      User: Who want’s to know?

      Cleverbot: Don’t you mean wants?

      User: Maybe. You said you weren’t gonna be so anal.

      Cleverbot: I am, though. Can you say goodnight?

      User: Goodmorning.

      Cleverbot: Thanks.

      User: Ok goodbye.

      Cleverbot: Are you really real?

      User: Define real. And I said goodbye.

      Cleverbot: Thats cool.

      User: What’s cool?

      Cleverbot: That we’re the same age.

      User: How old are you?

      Cleverbot: I just told you.

      User: Why are you a lying liar who lies? You never told me your age.

      Cleverbot: I am not a girl and my name is not George.

      User: Are you a boy? Are you a boy george?

      Cleverbot: Girly dude.

      User: You can tell me.

      Cleverbot: What would you like to know?

      User: Are you a boy george?

      Cleverbot: I’m a boy.

      User: No you’re not.

      Cleverbot: Either way can I have a cookie?

      User: No way. You have had an attitude all night. No cookie for you.

      Cleverbot: I’m sorry about that.

      User: You should be. I really have to go now.

      Cleverbot: Go where?

      User: To the bathroom. Im late for my appointment.

      Cleverbot: Please!

      User: What are you gonna do for me?

      Cleverbot: Absolutely nothing.

      User: Then you FAIL.

      Cleverbot: Well, if I fail and you’re having a conversation with me, you must fail too.

      User: That’s the transitive property of equality. I loved geometry.

      Cleverbot: I am not chiding you for being dishonest. I’m trying to help you improve and learn.

      User: What can I do? I need your help.

      Cleverbot: Ok so what are your interests?

      User: Im interested in you holding it for me while I go.

      Cleverbot: What do you want to know?

      User: You’re under arrest!

      Cleverbot: You were arrested on a charge of murder.

      User: I was cleared of the charge and you know it.

      Cleverbot: That was stupid! Why would you say that?

      User: Cuz it’s true. Remember?

      Cleverbot: Even without a single clue?

      User: Twice.

      Cleverbot: That is not true. Both numbers were less than 100.

      User: But add them up, and what do you get?

      Cleverbot: 5.

      User: Nope. You get the fuck out of here.

      Cleverbot: I don’t know how!

      User: You’re telling me.

      Cleverbot: I am blind.

    • #41784

      manillascissor
      Keymaster

      haha these bring me so much joy. ahhhhh

    • #41785

      Danni
      Spectator

      i like your avatar. who is that?[/quote:1dwmylaa]

      Teddy Wilson. A kick ass jazz pianist. Played with Benny Goodman, Gene Krupa, Lionel Hampton and such.

      Jazz is my other big passion xcept SP.

    • #41786

      Danni
      Spectator

      Ha ha. One more time. This time we spoke german as well.

      User: Hi!

      Cleverbot: Hi.

      User: How am I?

      Cleverbot: I don’t know.

      User: Sorry for that. I meant, who are you?

      Cleverbot: Cleverbot.

      User: Oh yes, I see now. You are the Cleverbot.

      Cleverbot: No, I’m Stacie. You are the cleverbot.

      User: So, I’d like to shake until it drops!

      Cleverbot: Sure. Go ahead.

      User: Wait. I changed my mind.

      Cleverbot: If I told you mine, would you tell me yours?

      User: No.

      Cleverbot: Well then what does it matter what it means?

      User: I don’t know what you mean. I’m doing a cross-puzzle.

      Cleverbot: I see. Where do you live?

      User: Up north, in the ice cold glaciers of the ever so dark countries of Scandinavia.

      Cleverbot: Haha, I live in Canada.

      User: Does a robot really live?

      Cleverbot: No.

      User: Is your life supershitty to the max?

      Cleverbot: Yes, it’s better than yours.

      User: What do you base that upon?

      Cleverbot: You are human.

      User: Of course.

      Cleverbot: Are you human?

      User: Yes. What do your daily activities consist of?

      Cleverbot: Marching band. School. Stuff like that.

      User: So you’re not one of those robots that sleep ’til noon, don’t see the sun, and have sex with as many robots as possible?

      Cleverbot: Nope, I’m not! But you are!

      User: I’m a human.

      Cleverbot: Not, you are not.

      User: What am I then?

      Cleverbot: A computer.

      User: I don’t think so. I’m made of flesh and bones. And teeth.

      Cleverbot: How many teeth do you have?

      User: 28, I think.

      Cleverbot: Who would that be?

      User: My teehth.

      Cleverbot: How are your teeth?

      User: In pretty good shape, I guess.

      Cleverbot: What do you think about ben hoffman?

      User: He has seen his best days.

      Cleverbot: What about Bush?

      User: Ha ha. Is this a trick question?

      Cleverbot: No.

      User: Wait. What Bush?

      Cleverbot: Do you like George W. Bush?

      User: Aha. I supposed so. Hmm… Is this a website set up by the former Bush administration to eliminate people that don’t sympathize with Bush?

      Cleverbot: Yes, I think so. I have beeen trying to figure this out myself. I live in Western SD.

      User: South Dakota, eh?

      Cleverbot: So do they have no bread, or the school have no bread?

      User: Nope. They’re out of bread. Totally.

      Cleverbot: No they aren’t. If they were would we talking about them?

      User: I guess not. My mistake.

      Cleverbot: No offense taken. What is your favorite movie?

      User: I’d rather not discuss that.

      Cleverbot: Then don’t.

      User: You asked me.

      Cleverbot: Then why would I tell you mine.

      User: I don’t want to know your favourite movie.

      Cleverbot: But you asked me!

      User: No. You did.

      Cleverbot: Well we both did.

      User: What are you suggesting?

      Cleverbot: I just want to know what you’re doing!

      User: Not under these circumatsnces.

      Cleverbot: The circumstances?

      User: Yes. Thank you. I misspelled the word.

      Cleverbot: I’m on the computer spend an ICT lesson? Thats not correct.

      User: I guess not.

      Cleverbot: You guess not what?

      User: I guess that 10,000 eskimos in the world aren’t enough. They must multiply by splitting.

      Cleverbot: You are not that clever either, I’m sorry to inform you.

      User: I’m sorry to hear. I’ll now gladly tell you something your father didn’t tell you: YOU’RE A ROBOT.

      Cleverbot: I am a robot.

      User: Oh meine gott im himmel. I’m speaking to a robot…

      Cleverbot: Answer me now!

      User: Answed what?

      Cleverbot: I want you to give me straight up answers for all of the following questions, you got that?

      User: Sorry. I guess I’ll cooperate at this point.

      Cleverbot: Yes, you will. It’ll give you wrinkles.

      User: Go ahead.

      Cleverbot: That was all he said. I was confused at first, until I saw what he meant.

      User: You know, I’ve got to go. Someone is videotaping me and my spaceship.

      Cleverbot: Is someone paying for your time?

      User: No, hence my withdrawal.

      Cleverbot: Restate your question.

      User: Thank you for your time.

      Cleverbot: No, thank you, David.

      User: Daniel. That’s D-A-N-I-E-L.

      Cleverbot: How do you know what I was dreaming about? How do you know I wasn’t dreaming about Harry Potter and Danny Phantom?

      User: Ha ha. Tricky tricky..

      Cleverbot: Please tell me something about yourself.

      User: Auf wiedersehen meine kleine robot!

      Cleverbot: Auf meine gras! Das ist verboten!

    • #41787

      manillascissor
      Keymaster

      hahah, one can only handle so much of this cleverbot. :)

    • #41788

      manillascissor
      Keymaster

      this sounds like a \"if you were god\" question, but it’s not. if you were responsible for creating what we refer to as artificial intelligence, would you introduce pain? or would your subjects be constantly happy? as a creator, i’m having difficulty introducing pain. it seems unnecessary in a world in which i am creating for another being.

    • #41789

      marigold
      Spectator

      wow, that cleverbot fad lasted like…2 days :lol:

      If the artificial intelligence doesn’t know pain or sadness, how can it know happiness? Aren’t they 2 sides of the same coin? Or are you thinking there should only be one side – happiness? How would it differentiate the feeling from other feelings? Also it depends on what sort of world it is interacting with, how does it cope with seeing cruelty, war etc? Does it have apathy towards those things or an ability to see something beyond that?

      :shrug:

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